How To Establish A Self Care Routine That Works

Imagine you are sitting on your laptop working on completing a task before your set deadline. You have been working hard to establish yourself as an authority figure in your industry. Then you remember that you have been pushing some smaller tasks to the side for the past couple of weeks. You still haven’t done them. As you are trying to complete this never-ending to-do list, your sleep quality has suffered. No matter how many hours you have cut out from your sleep, you still can’t tick everything off of your list. Next, your workouts are being affected. Your diet and nutrition are all over the place. Mood swings are happening left, right and centre. You are snapping at family and friends. You feel overwhelmed with life.

All you are trying to do is work hard and chase that bag, but your cup is empty. The current pace has left you burnt out. Then you realise that you haven’t been taking care of yourself and this way of life cannot continue. What do you do next? You promise yourself that after you finish this task, you will start taking better care of yourself.

For some people, they will honour the promise that they made to themselves and will start to establish a self care routine that works for them. Unfortunately others will fall into this constant cycle of ‘trying to do it all with an empty cup’. Only a small percentage of them will come out of this cycle while others, will be swept up into it again.

Why Self Care?

Self care is an essential behaviour. Unfortunately we live in a world that values hard work and productivity 24/7. It can be very difficult for most people to prioritise it because they are so many daily stressors, like to-do lists, internal and external pressures as well as expectations. Self care ends up coming second or in last place to everything.

“When you take time to replenish your spirit, it allows you to serve others from the overflow. You cannot serve from an empty vessel.”Eleanor Brownn

I still have moments like this, which has been a struggle to unlearn but I’m getting there. Sometimes I feel that if I am not productive for a day, I have failed or I start hearing my internal thoughts calling me lazy. This can be so far from the truth. I have to remind myself that rest is okay and very necessary. Having a day off does not equate to being lazy. My body, mind and soul need to rest and recovery.

Establishing a self care routine is similar to setting personal development goals. This time around, you are setting SMART goals for “me” time and putting yourself first.

To make time for self care, you've got to establish boundaries and protect your time.

Establish Boundaries

One of the most crucial things that you need to do to create a self care routine is to establish boundaries. The same way that you schedule time for work and it has your undivided attention, you have to carve out the same for yourself. The first step is protecting your time and taking care of it. If you want to have pockets of time each day to yourself, make a schedule and put it in your calendar. Create a focus or set your phone on DND so no distractions can pull you out of that moment.

I find having a phone very distracting! A lot of people believe that if you are not busy, or at work or out and about, you are constantly available. Phones mean that you are accessible to everyone all the time. Don’t get me wrong, it can be a good thing at times. However when you are trying to establish healthy routines for yourself, you have to be willing to say no. When someone asks you to do something during a time that you have scheduled to put yourself first, don’t be afraid to decline and suggest a different time. Saying no does not make you a bad person and it does not mean that you don’t care. It simply means that you are honouring the promises that you made to yourself by putting your needs first.

Self Care Must Be A Priority

“When you take time to replenish your spirit, it allows you to serve others from the overflow.” This part of the quote is something that is always missing and the second part can misused in certain circumstances. Self care is about individualised intentional actions to taking care of yourself. When you are consistently pouring into yourself with goodness, health, and gratitude, your cup becomes so full. Naturally you have the energy to pour into other people whether that is through maintaining and strengthening friendships, helping others in need or showing love to the others.

If you are not taking care of yourself properly, you are doing a disservice to yourself and to those around you. That’s why self care must be a priority to every single person. You have got to prioritise your needs and do the things that make you happy consistently. For those of you who have been around for a while, you know that I have a solo dates jar of ideas. This jar contains all the activities that I would like to do in my lifetime and I set them up as solo dates. This idea can easily be transformed into a self care jar of ideas. I recommend that you try it out and see if it works for you.

To establish healthy routines, you've got to know what makes you feel good.

Establishing Healthy Routines

Healthy routines are essential to support your entire being. That includes and is not limited to: the physical, mental, emotional, social, psychological being. Without health, there is no wealth. Without health, there is no world. To establish healthy routines, you’ve got to know what makes you feel good and what does not. For me, I like to wake up early and start my day before the sun rises and be asleep hours before midnight. What works for me may not work for you. Maybe you know that waking up at 6am makes you feel better than waking up much earlier or much later.

Here’s the thing, there is no cookie cutter plan for everyone when it comes to establishing healthy routines. It is all personalised to your specific lifestyle.

However, there are certain practices that will help you feel full of energy, happy and healthy.

Establish Physical Routines

  • Create a morning routine that sets you up for the day. Wake up at the same time every day.
  • Create an evening routine that winds you down for the day. Go to bed at the same time every day.
  • Exercise and move your body every day. That can include strength training, walking, yoga, pilates.
  • Ensure that you are eating whole and nutrient-rich foods daily. Limit the amount of processed foods that you eat.
  • Stay hydrated throughout the day to keep those water levels up and allow your body to perform its best.
  • To establish a healthy routine, you’ve got to prioritise your sleep quality.

Establish Mental Routines

  • Build a list of practices that help you relieve stress like breathing exercises, journaling, meditation etc.
  • Have a balance between fun and serious activities such as work, recreation and personal time.
  • Be a student of life. Never stop learning whether that is a new language, skill and a new sport. Always aim to learn something new each month.

Prioritise Social Connections

Whenever we talk about self care, I believe that the social aspect is not always included and it’s such an essential component. Being social and having social connections is vital for your overall well-being and happiness. We may think that because we are surrounded by people at work or our families that we have a lot of social contact. However when life becomes busy, it can become hard to make time for friends and it is very easy to neglect these relationships. Spending time with others helps us to build a network of people who can support us through the good times and the bad.

If most of your friends and family do not live in the same country and/or continent as you, you may think it is impossible to have that social contact. My siblings and I see each other once a year, if we are lucky. I speak to them every week and sometimes multiple times a week. When we are all free, the four of us jump on a video call. If texting is your go-to to maintain contact with friends and family, I suggest trying to do a video call once a week. Seeing someone’s face when you are talking to them feels so much better than texting. It feels like you are in the same room as them, the borders don’t exist and you are more likely to give them your undivided attention.

Again, to establish and prioritise social connections, create a schedule and put it in your calendar. Check in on your friends regularly. If you are thinking about someone, text them. Host events like games night, ski and slumber, picnics, dinners etc. to build those relationships that are valuable to you.

Look for moments of beauty in your day and appreciate the small things.

Establish & Romanticise Your Daily Activities

Lastly, romanticise your daily activities. It can be so easy to get lost in your daily and structured routine, that you lose sight of the little things that make your day great. As I wake up before sunrise and am usually in the gym until the sun is up, I hardly catch the sun rising. On the days when I do see the sun rise, I like to pause and enjoy the colours mixing in the sky.

You should be looking for moments of beauty in your day whether that is the shapes of your plates and glasses, or the music that you play when you are doing your skincare routine. It can be as simple as you using your favourite pen to write in your journal or a new bookmark for your book. To establish a self care routine is to appreciate the small things, be grateful and celebrate everything that you have in your life. Live your life through a mindset of abundance.

Final Thoughts

Don’t wait until you are overwhelmed with life and burnt out to establish a self care routine for yourself. Protecting and scheduling moments of “me” time throughout the day should be prioritised, so that your spirit is consistently being replenished with goodness, health and gratitude. Once your cup is full and overflowing, the excess can be easily poured into those around you. As you gradually build and progress your healthy routines, do not forget to create physical and mental routines that leave you full of energy and happiness to do the activities that make you feel good.

Then, prioritise social connections with family and friends. These people are your network to support you in peaks and troughs of life. Lastly, celebrate and appreciate every moment in your life. Your daily activities and those moments of beauty that you probably take for granted. Self care is specific to your lifestyle but adding these routines here and there, will make life feel more wealthy.


It’s 2025 and this is the time to start putting yourself first. If you haven’t established those routines, you’ve got ten months to start working on them. Make them count. Make sure to hit that subscribe button to join the community and never miss out on a post. Find me on Instagram, Pinterest and TikTok for more powerlifting and wellness content.

Until next time,

Folakemi


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