Fear of failure. Rejection. Success…it’s a common emotion that we all feel multiple times throughout our lives. We give fear so much power at times that it can stop us from even starting our dreams. If we allow fear to consume and paralyse us, we feel trapped in box. We stay within our comfort zones preventing us from unlocking our full potentials. On the other side, fear is can be a good thing. It can help us to break out of that trapped box and work towards our desires and dreams. Sometimes the fear of doing something can push to remain focused on our grass. This eventually leads us to finding fulfilment in what we want to achieve.
Whether it is your powerlifting journey or starting your personal development journey, sometimes the fear of succeeding is so much greater than the fear of failing. Fear ending up taking more space because I was scared to see what my future may be. Have you experienced that kind of fear before? How did you overcome it?
To Overcome Fear
I remember when I first started my lifting journey, I was so scared to walk into the weight room. The feeling of looking like an amateur and being out of place continuously stopped me for some time. The fear of injuring myself and making a mistake was running in my mind. Most of all, I was scared that I would enjoy it. I had no clue what that meant for my life. I’m happy to say that taking that leap of faith and jumping into the unknown of lifting has brought me so much happiness these last eight years. I have no idea where I would be today if I had never tried that out or given up on myself.
“I will not surrender to my fears.”
– Folakemi Olamide
The Positive & Negative Side
I go through thoughts like this anytime I want to start something new. I did the same thing when I chose to start solo travelling, when I chose to learn powerlifting, when I chose to do my first meet and more recently, when I chose to become a content creator. Each endeavour we choose will always have an element of fear, but it is how we define and give power to that fear that changes the way we perceive it.
There will always be that side of fear where we are scared that we are going to completely fail. However, there is also that positive side where we are excited and nervous that we will say yes. That yes gives us an opportunity to explore the unknown. We may succeed in ways that we did not imagine.
What Is Fear?
We have nothing to fear but fear itself. Fear is an emotion that occurs based on an outcome that hasn’t happened. It paralyse us and can cause mania.
Whenever I feel that kind of fear, I pause and breathe. I try, keyword, try to lead the thing that I fear with an intention and turn it into a potential positive.
For example, ‘I will not surrender to my fears’. ‘ I intend to give myself permission to grow and make mistakes.’ I’ll use these as words of affirmations. Repeat them to myself whenever I feel a moment of doubt.
When we give fear that power to direct our future, we no longer have the control to steer ourselves to the life that want. I do my best to not let it decide my future. There are so many chapters that I want to fill by width. I can’t do that if I let fear guide me. You can’t do that if you let fear write your life for you.
“I intend to give myself permission to grow and make mistakes.”
– Folakemi Olamide
Freedom
There is a kind of freedom when you release your grip and step into the realm of the unknown. You know what makes a difference? Having confidence in yourself and trusting that you have made the right decision for your present self. Working on building up my confidence for the last eight years has made me say yes to new experiences. I have learnt to say no to things that don’t make me feel alive. So I can say yes to things that I’m afraid to do.
Operating from a place of fear has its pros and cons like anything in life. However, you need to tell yourself that no matter what happens, every experience will bring a lesson your way. You will learn from them, you will prosper and grow into the person and into the life that you want. You need to say yes, try them and commit to showing up for yourself.
A Word of Advice
I’ve been that girl who was frustrated for not seeing progress. That girl who was scared to wear shorts to the gym because the feeling of insecurity is high. The girl who was scared to ask for help. I’ve also been that girl who gets up each day and tries again consistently. You can be that girl too. You are not alone. Get up and keep going. Don’t let fear write your future for you. Imagine where you’ll be in a year’s time, if you keep on going. Imagine how much more confident and secure in yourself you’ll be, if you keep on going.
