Fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of succeed…it’s a common emotion that we all feel multiple times throughout our lives. We give fear so much power at times that it can stop us from even starting our on our dreams. If we allow fear to consume and paralyse us, we feel trapped in box and stay within our comfort zones preventing us from unlocking our full potentials.
On the other side, fear can be seen as a good thing. It can help us to break out of that trapped box and work towards our desires and dreams. I didn’t realise this until earlier this year, but sometimes the fear of something can push us to remain focused on what we are doing, eventually leading us to find fulfilment in what we achieve.
Whether that is your powerlifting journey or starting your personal development journey…sometimes the fear of succeeding is so much greater than the fear of failing. In the past, I have allowed it to take up so much space because I was scared to see what my future could look like. Have you experienced that kind of fear before? How did you overcome it?
I remember when I first started my lifting journey, I was so scared to walk into the weight room because I felt like an amateur and felt out of place. I was scared that I would injure myself and I would make a mistake and it get it wrong. Most of all, I was scared that I would enjoy it and I hadn’t thought what that meant for my life. I’m happy to say that taking that leap of faith and jumping into the unknown of lifting has brought me so much happiness these last eight years. I have no idea where I would be today if I had never tried that out or given up on myself.
“I will not surrender to my fears.”– Folakemi Olamide
I go through thoughts like this anytime I want to start something new. I did the same thing when I chose to start solo travelling, when I chose to learn powerlifting, when I chose to do my first meet and more recently, when I chose to become a content creator. Each endeavour we choose will always have an element of fear, but it is how we define and give power to that fear that changes the way we perceive it. There will always be that negative side of fear where we are scared that we are going to fail and completely fail at it…there is also that other side, the positive side where we are excited and nervous that if we say yes and let ourselves explore this unknown, we will succeed in ways that we couldn’t have imagined.
We have nothing to fear but fear itself. Fear is an emotion that occurs based on an outcome that hasn’t happened. It paralyse us and can cause mania. Whenever I feel that kind of fear, I pause and breath. I try, keyword, try to lead the thing that I fear with an intention and turn it into a potential positive. For example, ‘I will not surrender to my fears’ or ‘ I intend to give myself permission to grow and make mistakes.’ I’ll use these as words of affirmations and say them to myself whenever I feel a moment of doubt. When we give fear that power to dictate the direction of our future, we no longer have the control to steer ourselves to the life that want. I do my best to not let it decide my future because I have so many chapters that I want to fill by width. I can’t do that if I let fear guide me. You can’t do that if you let fear write your life for you.
“I intend to give myself permission to grow and make mistakes.”– Folakemi Olamide
There is a kind of freedom when you release your grip and step into the realm of the unknown. You know what makes a difference? Having confidence in yourself and trusting that you have made the right decision for your present self. Working on building up my confidence and trusting in my process for the last eight years has made me say yes to new experiences. I have learnt to say no to things that don’t make me feel alive in order to say yes to things that I’m afraid to do because I’m scared that I will do well in them.
Operating from a place of fear has its pros and cons like anything in life but you need to tell yourself that no matter what happens, every experience will bring a lesson your way. You will learn from them, you will prosper and grow into the person and into the life that you want. You need to say yes, try them and commit to showing up for yourself.
I’ve been that girl who was frustrated for not seeing progress. I’ve been that girl who was scared to wear shorts to the gym because she felt insecure. I’ve been that girl who was scared to ask for help. I’ve also been that girl who gets up each day and tries again to get one step closer to her goals. You can be that girl too. You are not alone. Get up and keep going. Don’t let fear write your future for you. Imagine where you’ll be in a year’s time, if you keep on going. Imagine how much more confident and secure in yourself you’ll be, if you keep on going.